Hyperemesis Gravidarum - my story

Hyperemesis gravidarum is a condition characterized by severe nausea, vomiting, weight loss, and electrolyte disturbance. Mild cases are treated with dietary changes, rest and antacids. More severe cases often require a stay in the hospital so that the mother can receive fluid and nutrition through an intravenous line (IV).

It's very hard for others to understand what is going on with me.  Everyone has a recommendation, cure, suggestion or worse thinks you are causing this to happen or aren't trying hard enough to stop it.  It's hard.  I feel very alone.  I don't feel like anyone understands what I'm going through.  In my latest hospital stay, they gave me more information on my condition.  I learned that HG only occurs in 0.5 - 2% of pregnancies.  I am worried that I'm close to being depressed.  I can't look at food, talk about food, hear any food words or smell food without getting sick.  I hate that everyone around me is eating all the time.  I don't remember what it is like to like food. I don't feel like I'm being a good wife or mom due to my illness.  I don't have the strength to do everyday chores.  Even if I did, the more active I am, the sicker I get.  I'm only 9 weeks and have already lost 15lbs.  I want people to think I am doing all that I can to help this - so I eat very bland foods (this way there is no strong taste when it comes back up) like plain oatmeal, dry toast, unseasoned mashed potatoes...etc.  These foods also don't choke you 2nd time around :( .  I've learned that drinking pedialite or gatorade helps a little better than water with my electrolite levels, which are usually very low.

Maybe I should explain the difference between morning sickness and HG so you have a better idea of what it is:

Morning sickness:
Nausea sometimes accompanied by vomiting
Nausea usually subsides at 12 weeks or soon after
Vomiting that does not cause sever dehydration
Vomiting that still allows you to keep some food down
Usually does not interfere with daily activities

Hyperemesis Gravidarum:
Nausea accompanied by severe vomiting
Nausea that does not subside
Vomiting that causes severe dehydration
Vomiting that does not allow you to keep any food down
Food adversions
Weight loss of 5% or more of your pre-pregnancy weight
Decrease in urination
Headaches / confusion / fainting / jaundice / extreme fatigue
Low blood pressure
Rapid heart rate
Secondary anxiety/depression

I  have all of the following symptoms from the above list:
Nausea accompanied by severe vomiting
Nausea that does not subside
Vomiting that causes severe dehydration
Vomiting that does not allow you to keep any food down
Food adversions
Weight loss of 5% or more of your pre-pregnancy weight
Decrease in urination
Headaches / extreme fatigue
Low blood pressure
Rapid heart rate
Secondary anxiety/depression

It's hard for my OB to fully understand the disease.  They are not sure what the cause of this is.  It's thought to be due to hormone levels increasing so rapidly.  I don't understand why it targets certain people.  I would like to think there will be a cure one day.  The worse stomach flu experience you have ever had doesn't even compare to the pain and sickness associated with HG.  This is my second pregnancy and I was hoping it would be different than my first.  I lost 25lbs with my first. My blood pressure was 77/44 , 84/56 , and  87/61.   I just got released from the hospital yesterday after begging my doctor to send me home after 3 days.  I'm taking a combination of two nausea medications and my goal is to stay hydrated.  After researching this disease, I know being in the hospital will not help subside the nausea.  It's not going anywhere.  My doctor wanted to keep me until I was no longer nauseous.  I can't stay in the hospital for weeks or months.  I have a family and a job.  I can't afford to not work.

I worry about losing my job.  I worry about abandoning people around me that I care about.  I don't want to whine or be negative so I don't call anyone or answer my phone.  I cry all the time hoping to find someone who understands what I'm going through.  I hope writing my story down will maybe help someone else not feel so alone.  There are many other mothers in the same boat and I like to read their stories as support:
http://www.helpher.org/


Good luck to any mom dealing with HG! Hugs!